I’ve had my tough times to be sure, but in general I am a very lucky girl. I have a job that I enjoy, a roof over my head, wonderful friends and family, and all of you out there making me laugh and sharing your fabulous internet selves with me.  

On top of that, I got to be a Gap Brand Ambassador and throw a fantastic party and give away tons of free jeans and gift cards this summer to my friends and readers at a “Born to Fit” party. But after the party was done and the giveaways handled, I ended up with a few pairs of men’s jeans that no one I knew could fit into. I thought about passing them off to Goodwill, but brand new Gap jeans seemed too good for a donations box, just so some college student could buy them for $10 down the line.   

And then I thought, where could I find some men who could really use these? My local veterans hospital is nearby and has several great programs: one to help homeless veterans turn their lives around, with on site housing, job training, the works. Many of the other patients have limited clothing when they arrive and could use something clean and nice other than hospital scrubs for job interviews and starting over. And the newly returning veterans have been wearing uniforms every day and would love some civilian wear.

I contacted my hook-up with the Gap and asked, just to keep the ol’ ethics clean, and got the green light. Today, these guys get an early Christmas.

If you have new or gently used clothing you would like to donate to clothe veterans in need (especially winter stuff and new socks, underwear, and t-shirts), you can find your local Veterans Affairs medical center here . The home page should list a contact for the voluntary services department who can tell you how you can help.  

And remember our female Veterans as well! I didn’t have any women’s items to donate, but they would love donations for everyone who serves: young and old, male and female, and at any time of year. They can always use jeans, khakis, polos, and sweaters/ sweatsuits in any size.

Yes, I stole your questionnaire, Lora. It’s been a busy month and I have a lot of posting to do before I head home for the holidays…. I promise your answers are funnier.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? I’d rather use paper, but since most of my gifts have to fly home with me for the holidays, wrapping is a no-no. The post office was supposed to bring me flat-rate boxes so I could wrap and ship, but they never did. Oh well, I’ll be reusing my Mom’s recycled gift bags again.  

 2. Real tree or Artificial? Artificial. I’d rather have real, but my townhouse is tiny and I’m out of town so often that I’d worry about fire. My 4′ fake one has served me well for the last three years.

3. When do you put up the tree? If it were up to me, I’d put it up on Thanksgiving evening, but since I cook the whole Thanksgiving feast around these parts (and then get stuck with most of the clean-up), I usually get around to it when the clean-up is done and I’ve recovered from my turkey hangover.

4. When do you take the tree down? It’s bad luck unless it comes down on New Year’s. Last year I missed the deadline by, oh, two weeks or so…

5. Do you like eggnog? I have to thin it out with milk. Or booze. Rum, to be precise. It’s too thick straight from the carton.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? Probably a book. I was a very bookish little thing. Oh, and there was the year everyone was insane over Cabbage Patch Kids and my parents both bought them just in case, so I looked very spoiled with two. If only cell phones had been invented they could have saved the cash.

7. Do you have a nativity scene? I have one that I got on clearance when I worked at Michael’s  one year in college. Small and somewhat tacky, but it does the job.

8. Hardest person to buy for? My fancy younger sister. I usually give up around now and just buy something small with a Coach logo on it.

9. Easiest person to buy for? BC, hands down.

10. Worst Christmas gift ever received? Christmas came just after the start of a new relationship in 2001 and I gave cologne. I got a rainbow stuffed peace sign rearview mirror thingy. Because “you’re all into politics and stuff.”

11. Mail or e-mail Christmas card? Mail. Always mail. And I’d use lickable stamps if I could still buy them. I heart stationery. And writing little notes inside. I used to send 70 or so out per year. This year I slopped together 20, but they went out in time. I don’t know if anyone is still sending them- I’ve only gotten two so far.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? All of the classics will always hold a special, near-and-dear spot in my heart, but I love “Elf”. It cracks me up every time. I like to whisper, too.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I used to wait until December, but now that I try to shop on Etsy  and buy handmade, I start a little bit closer to Halloween to be sure everything can be made and arrive in time. I still have three people to shop for this weekend, so I’m no early finisher.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?  I don’t think I’ve ever re-gifted a Christmas gift. Wine brought to a party? Sure. I have given away a ton of Christmas gifts that I hated to people who didn’t hate them or had the room for them or to Goodwill. I like to think of it as finding them better homes.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Yorkshire pudding  ftw! (I get to have one Southern and one British Christmas and I do love some Paula Deen, but Yorkshire pudding only comes out once a year).

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Clear, with lots of ticky-tacky homemade and souvenir ornaments to add color.

17. Favorite Christmas song? Silent Night makes me go all mushy and lumpy in the throat every time. If you get a small child to sing it, there may be actual tears.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Always travel. The whole family is in Georgia and Tennessee and I am in Pittsburgh. It’s much easier for one of me to go there than vice versa. When I have octuplets though, they are all gonna have to come to my place.

19. Can you name Santa’s reindeer? Every last one.

20. Do you have an Angel on top or a star? I grew up in an angel house, but I’m a star girl myself.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas morning. My mom always has us open pajamas on Christmas Eve. It’s a running family joke that she always buys mine too small. In every Christmas morning picture, I look like a stuffed sausage in my tiny Christmas pajamas.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? That my birthday is the 23rd. I have long sworn to do nothing Christmas-related on my birthday. I always cave in and pick up a last-minute gift, or fly home, or exchange presents with someone at a birthday happy hour though.

23. Ugliest Christmas Decoration ever invented? I am not a fan of those plastic icicles on the tree- they get everywhere and make an Easter basket-sized clean-up.

25. Which looks best theme trees or homey trees? I am a total home-y tree gal- the tackier the better. Handmade. Handpainted. Or even this little winner I grabbed at the Dulles airport:

26. Gingerbread or sugar cookies? Sugar. With sprinkles or colored sugar or jelly or chocolate chips or really anything sweet and tasty that you can do to a cookie. I do like a gingerbread scented candle though.

27. Do you like Fruitcake? Nope. My dear granny is a huge fan, so when I see it I think of her and get all warm and fuzzy, but it’s not going in my mouth.

We’ve been talking about it for years and we finally broke down after six days in New Orleans and did it. We both love the city like a home and this was our third trip down together. BC and I have…. wait for it…. matching tattoos.

Yes. I am practically 33 years old (one week to go) and I and my gay best friend of the last ten years got matching tattoos.

Wanna see?

And no, for those of you with dirty minds, it is not in an intimate location- just on my left side below the armpit, an inch or so below the bottom of the bra-line.  Which come to think of it is fairly intimate… I mean I don’t run around with my ribs exposed much. And it’s tiny. About an inch or so high. But I love it. And when it stops looking all new and scabby, maybe I’ll have more reason to show off my ribs- if I can even find a flattering option to do that… ok, not likely.

And maybe there are no such thing as friend vows, but this is mighty permanent. This Christmas, this is enough.

The work travel is beyond belief this month, with a week in New Orleans, two days in DC, and a transfer in Atlanta already under my belt in the last 15  days. BC managed to join me for the New Orleans revelry for the entire week, so after long conference days, I dragged myself out into the Quarter for food and cocktails and long walks where we laughed until I had stomach cramps.

Now that I’m back to the real world and trying to plan out 2010 and beyond, it’s time to start a house hunt in earnest. If BC and I are baby-bound, this mama needs a non-rented roof to put over my head with a little yard and room for a washer/dryer. I love my current townhouse, but I’ll be damned if I’ll semi-single parent and have to walk six blocks to do the baby’s laundry. A girl has her limits.

Which begs the question… how the heck do you go about buying a house? BC just bought one and has a great eye for real estate, but I need an introduction to the ins and outs of the financial piece. Does anyone have any recommended books and/ or websites for beginners? Any definite must-do’s and don’ts? I’m hoping to get into something in time to take advantage of the extended first time home buyer credit, so all help is welcome.

BC and I had a long discussion about life the other night over wine and cheese. The consensus? What if we are the only ones who believe our own promises about the future? How do you guarantee the future and those promises when there’s no vows for friends?

Let me back up and explain. My dear BC has long had a theory of communal friendship that is based on karma. He has helped so many people move in this life that he should never have to carry his own sofa again. He always brings soup to sick people, and so when he gets the sniffles, his soup runneth over. He handles late night rescues with grace, and thus when he needs rescued, people answer their phones in the middle of the night.

But, we both wondered, where are the guarantees? Had I gotten married, I would have taken vows that promised that as long as we lived we would be there for each other, help each other out, and never leave. But when your friends are your only permanent family, how do you relax?

I know, and firmly informed BC, that if he needed round-the-clock care forever and ever, he would move in to my place and that would be the end of that. Regardless of my romantic life, BC has been and will continue to be my family. But in my darkest heart of hearts? I can’t 100% relax that he would do the same. He is the best person I know and I am almost positive that if it came down to it, I could count on him until I’m 90 and need to be put in a home. But, really? He doesn’t have to. The vows problem. There is no surefire way to be sure you count on a friend, other than by their past actions.

In which case, I think I’ll be ok. He took his own vacation time and sat through my surgery last fall and toted me home like a champ without batting an eyelash. And when we’re in New Orleans in two weeks, he’s the only person I trust to carry me down Bourbon Street.  And I think, after taking a deep breath, I can count on him for the long haul- even if there are no vows for a woman and her gay best friend.

It’s been quite a month here in Eleanor-land. It all started when I dropped my Blackberry in the toilet. Or rather, it committed suicide. Either way, the poor thing was ding dong dead. Which meant I had to buy a new one. And that I lost all of my links and phone numbers, because no, I never backed it up with my laptop. Am I the only person who doesn’t even know her own mother’s phone number without it typed in the cell phone address book?

And without the Blackberry, there was no more Twitter, because I can’t access it from my work computer and I’ve been trying to stay offline when I’m home. Oh, and since my DVD player stopped spinning, I’ve been using my laptop as a movie viewer at night. Which means it’s all the way upstairs in the bedroom, so it might as well be in Timbuktu when I’m couching.

Oh and then there’s the work travel. Charleston one week, Atlanta the next. (By the way, I met Shaft at a hotel bar…). I’m off to DC twice, New Orleans, and Atlanta again before the year is over. My suitcase looks like it’s been in a losing battle. And it now lives in my front room, the better to whisk out the door with it.

And oh yeah, I’ve been writing. Not much here, obviously, but I’m trying to squeeze in an hour a day scribbling something down. And I got the loveliest rejection letter from The Atlantic Monthly.

And I got in a fight with my dad over Fox News, but I think we’re ok now.

And BC and I went out on Wednesday for “a quick drink” and ended up loudly drowning the night over bourbon and beer and playing along with Jeopardy (my strong suit) and Wheel of Fortune (his). I woke up this morning hating myself and he woke up with a half-eaten donut of unknown origin on his kitchen table. I think he wins.

Which all goes to say- SHE LIVES! (Thanks to all of you who’ve checked in to be sure…).

I am officially obsessed with Texts From Last Night. I can’t help myself. My entire lunch break, I have been calling people and reading various entries aloud. Yes, I know I’m a big dork. Also, some of you texters… well, I wanna hang out with you. Also, it’s Friday and this lady would like to follow her yoga class after work with an adventure. I hope BC bought the bourbon.

Congrats to the following winners in the free “Born to Fit”  Gap jeans drawing, courtesy of the scientific hat: Wide Lawns  and “Jen” (commenter #34). Keep an eye out in your email for one from me so I can get your address and mail your certificate. Hooray for Thursday winners!

But I am livid and more than a little peeved about the awful decorum  from one South Carolina congressman last night during the healthcare speech. Joe Wilson, you should be ashamed of yourself.

This is the face of the Republican “debate” on healthcare. My Granny would not invite you to her house for dinner, sir, and she is a Republican. You have bad manners. And you apologize poorly.  

If you feel as ticked off as me and can’t access the Congressman’s website due to traffic, you can contact him the old-fashioned way at:

Congressman Joe Wilson

212 Cannon House Office Building

Washington, DC 20515

(202)-225-2452 phone

Thank you.

And now back to our regularly scheduled programming…

Summer was a short one here in Pittsburgh this year- it never really warmed up until mid-July, I was gone for most of August, and now we’re dipping into the 50’s at night and back in flannel pj’s. In the ten years we’ve been friends, BC and I have made a ritual of squeezing the last out of the beautiful weather while it lasts, before we’re stuck in gray slush for six months. Yesterday was no exception.

As soon as I dipped out of the office, I headed to Squirrel Hill to rendezvous with a pile of books and notebooks in my groaning bag. Then we dodged the traffic and headed to Schenley Park, where we sprawled on a blanket in the grass until the sun had finally slipped below the horizon. As usual for these adventures, I read exactly nothing. Instead we plotted out highly profitable novel and book ideas, made jokes about anorexic babies (yes, we’ll burn in hell), and ate an entire bowl of fresh blueberries. Then it was over to Cold Stone Creamery for chocolate cake batter ice cream with strawberries as dinner.

Our plan for this long weekend is to cram as many summer activities in as possible- we’ll hit up the amusement park, drink cocktails on BC’s porch, etc. Any suggestions for must-do summer fling weekend agenda items? The idea is to fit a whole summer into three days. What would you do if you had to fit your summer into a long weekend?